Sanuki no Suke’s Diary: Memories of the Imperial Palace (9)

 

     As I make my way home—even though I manage to slip away before midnight this time—I feel an inexplicable sadness. Why should I worry so much about what others think?

     When I was attending to the late Emperor, whom I had served so intimately, I used to worry whenever I had to leave the palace after dark. Whenever he noticed I was eager to head home, he would deliberately try to cause me trouble. He stubbornly refused to finish his routines promptly.

     ---It was one night when I was in a great hurry to leave. The late Emperor was visiting the Empress's palace and did not return until late into the night. I waited for his return and suggested he proceed with his nightly routines, but for some reason, he saw right through me and began to bring up my departure.

     "Yes, I must leave tonight," I replied.

     The moment he heard this, he lay down and said,

"Tonight, let's leave all the routines until after dawn. I am sleepy. Let's just go to sleep now."

Then, with a mischievous smile, he added, "If anyone sees us like this, they will surely think they've stumbled into a rather scandalous situation."

     "I will not let anyone think such a thing! Besides, my attendants and Izumi, my maid, are waiting for me. They will be troubled," I said.

     The Emperor replied:

"Izumi will be troubled? More like ‘It's me’ who's troubled! Well, whoever cares—I'm perfectly fine!"

     He lay down on the tatami mat, fixing his gaze upon me.

"Oh, what a pity. You clearly hate this, don't you? What should I do? I am just so tired, let me rest," he said.

"Please bear with me for just a little while. Oh, this is so painful!"

     He kept exaggerating his exhaustion, making a big fuss over nothing, all while laughing at me.

     Now, on my way home, I find myself reminiscing fondly about all of this.